February 18, 2013


Today's big excitement was all about not being admitted to the hospital.  I'm still waiting on test results for one more thing and could very well be admitted tomorrow.  But for tonight, I'm in my own home and my own bed and Jacob is safe and sound right where he is - in my tummy.  Though my blood pressure is having issues, he seems to be doing fine as we monitored him for half an hour this morning. 

But to be honest, this whole bedrest bit is getting hard.  Partly because I have the nesting bug and I can't nest.  Even if I wanted to break the rest rules and organize a cabinet or clean my windows, I physically cannot - my back and hips are in that bad of shape.  And partly because I'm lonely and am starting to feel cooped up.  Though I am truly trying to enjoy these moments of rest and quiet and the time I'm having with just Tommy and I, it feels hard too.  And I'm pretty sure the fact that I'm no longer working hasn't really sunk in just yet.

I was able to sit and make something though - a Christmas present for my friend, though obviously quite late.  She wanted an everyday wreath for her door and I love how the random color combination turned out on this one.
It's weird to think that I'll have more time for this.  All of this.  Making wreaths.  Writing.  Organizing cabinets and cleaning windows once my body is back to normal.  Playing and spending time with my boys.  I updated my "job" on my Facebook profile.  I listed that I work at home as a mom/Domestic Goddess (a term coined by my awesome friend Mal)/writer.  I'm not a bookkeeper anymore.  I'm just me.  Weird.

And me is on bedrest until this baby is born.

Perhaps it feels hard to enjoy it at the moment since I'm not driving or going anywhere or getting out of the house other than to see the doctor.  I know it will pass, but these last several days have felt challenging in their own right.  And not having Todd here in the midst of it adds to the ache.

I don't want to sound complainy.  I am really trying to embrace this short season where I'm resting and it's just Tommy and I.  But I'm feeling the void of what isn't there too.

Tomorrow's agenda?  More resting.  And probably not more wreath-making because I have somehow run out of hot glue.  And hopefully staying out of the hospital for a bit longer too.


  1. This time will all too soon be a distant memory. Before you know it you'll be holding that new baby boy in your arms! I know it can't be easy, but take good care now and nurture those boys and yourself the best you can!

  2. my sister was on bedrest for a while too and she absolutely hated it. she is a busy body so for her to sit still and actually rest was foreign to her. i have a feeling i would be the same way.

    but sometimes rest is all we need. so i hope you take this time to just give your body what it needs because just think a little baby named Jacob will be taking all your rest shortly :)