Organized Chaos

I have to admit, I'm not a very organized person. In all honesty, my home is really just organized chaos. Even when it's clean, if you were to really start opening drawers and cabinets and looking at things up close, you would find that things are just kind of messy. And I guess it's felt like I never have the time to tackle everything that needs to be done.

There is this picture I took recently after I completed my redecorating and I love how clean and tidy and organized my kitchen looks. Seriously, just looking at this picture makes me feel calm inside because it looks so neat. Sadly, I'm pretty the sure the last time my kitchen looked exactly like this was the time I took this picture. *sigh*
Thanks to Pinterest, I came across an awesome blog today that issued a 21-day organizing challenge. I made a few tweaks to the list so that it could apply to my home and for what I need to get more organized.

1) Junk Drawer
2) Computer Desk/Mail situation
3) Tupperware cabinet(s)
4) Linen closet/cabinets
5) Under the kitchen sink
6) Dresser drawers
7) The pantry
8) Coat/Guest room closet
9) Toy storage/Tommy's room
10) Laundry room
11) Freezer
12) Spice cabinet
13) Medicine cabinet
14) Under bathroom sinks
15) Dining room (buffet drawers)
16) Refrigerator
17) Kitchen pots, pans & utensil drawer
18) Keepsakes
19) Master bedroom closet
20) Photos
21) Your choice - Scrapbooking area

I've decided to embrace this challenge and tackle some of the disorganization in my house. I've also decided to give myself a bit of grace and if I can't make the deadline in exactly 21 days, it won't be the end of the world. I just want to finish it and hopefully be more organized at the end of it all!

The deeper side to all of this.....I think lately I've felt overwhelmed by some of the things in my heart that need continued unpacking or healing or examining. I've wondered if I'll be in therapy forever - not that it would be a bad thing, but just because there is so much there that still needs talking about and crying over. It gets wearing after awhile and it's been hard to not believe that maybe I'm just screwed up and hopeless. And I know those things aren't true, yet some days, it's felt hard to believe anything else.

The last couple of weeks I have just felt discouraged in how big some things just feel and I've wondered if I will ever be able to live out my life the way I really want to.

One of the things a friend suggested that I do, is to just do the things that I can. Which sounds simple, but I've found it to be easier said than done. My friend suggested though, that instead of stressing out about how much there is around me that needs to get done whether in my home or my life or my heart, to just get done what I can. To visualize things in boxes and get to one box at a time. And any box that feels too big to go through on my own, go through it with someone else. And to even put that box back on a shelf until a later time. It sounds like good advice, but I wonder if it's really do-able I guess.

I guess when I came across this organizing challenge today that I was filled with some hope. Not just that my home will look and feel better if I can tackle a little project day by day, but that maybe that there is still hope for all of the "projects" that I still feel are undone inside of myself. Maybe in all of the organizing and cleaning things up around my home, I'll be able to do a bit of this for my heart as well.

I'm starting tomorrow - junk drawer day. I wonder what "junk" I'm holding on to?